1. Everyone looks better in leather. Get yourself a jacket.
2. Keep a clean room. No one else wants to see your underwear all over the floor. Dirty or clean.
3. Something I've been wondering- what is the proper etiquette when it comes to left over condoms? You know, the dude or chick you regularly start sleeping with brings some to leave at your house, but you don't want to tap it anymore. So now you have these condoms sitting in your nightstand, that you didn't get. Do you give them back? Do you use them with your next partner? Do you throw them away?
4. The better route is to pretend like you've never met them before. Because they were probably drunk and don't remember it.
5. Never order an entire pizza without this intentions of sharing it with everyone there. Not only is that selfish, but goddamn, HOW FUCKING FAT ARE YOU??
6. Discuss your problems with your close friends. And only discuss it when they are really bothering you. Don't bombard everyone at the bar with your personal mishaps. You don't want to be known as a poor sap, do you?
7. Please don't let the cold weather be an excuse for low-maintenance pubes.
8. Morning sex is great, but morning masturbation is awesome too. And at least you will give yourself the respect as to washing your hands before. In other words, sleeping alone isn't all that bad.
9. I don't know if it is just me, but there is something really sexy about a foul mouth.
10. Don't think that because you read "Look At This Fucking Hipster" that you're not a hipster.
11. You want them because they aren't available.
